Reading: Alexandria, by Nick Bantock, the second book in the sequel trilogy to Griffin & Sabine. (Sequel trilogy? Does that make any sense?) I can't even begin to explain how much I adore these books. You don't just read them, you experience them.

Listening: To my newly arrived soundtrack to the Buffy musical, which I had all downloaded but this is way better. Joss Whedon's liner notes are hilarious.

Watching: Not much, actually. I missed the whole dismemberment thing on ER, though I turned it on briefly after it happened and got to see the stump. There's Buffy and there's West Wing and there will be 24, but I haven't seen a new show that I'm really excited about yet.

Here's the thing, people. I have absolutely nothing to write about. My temp job is the only thing going on that I actually want to share with you, but doing so could lead to all kinds of bad things like prosecution and disbarment. The work is incredibly interesting, but everything I do is privileged. I can't even tell you the name of the client, which just sucks, because it really is kind of cool.

However, there are, in fact, a few other ways in which I could be prosecuted for stuff. So let's follow up the totally inappropriate "How Much Money I've Made in My Life" entry with the equally ill-advised "Reasons I Could Be Arrested Every Time I Get in My Car" entry.

Reason #1: My license plates expire at midnight tonight. Which means I finally have to get off my ass and admit to the state of Virginia that I actually live here by registering my car and getting a Virginia driver's license. You're supposed to do those things within sixty days of moving here (so really, I've already been a scofflaw for a couple of months), but I paid for a full year of registration in Kansas, and I wanted to get my money's worth. So today, I go online to see exactly what I have to do to get the registration, and as I suspected, car insurance is required.

Reason #2: I have no car insurance. I think I only wrote an e-mail entry about this, but back in July, when my previous policy with Progressive was scheduled to be renewed, I called and told them I was in a new state and they said they would just give me a new policy and cancel the old one, which they did, except not really as they then withdrew the premium for the old one out of my checking account (I had the old policy on automatic debit) and it took me three weeks to get my money back. Well, in August, they did it again, only I didn't know it until I got my bank statement at the beginning of September, so I called again and told them to kiss my ass and cancelled everything, except I never actually found a new insurance company. So today, I called Geico to get new insurance so I could go register my car, and the nice woman who was taking my policy information had the pleasure of informing me about reason #3.

Reason #3: My driver's license is suspended. To be honest, I had a sneaking suspicion about this one, because after I got a ticket for having expired tags in Kansas last February, I never actually got around to paying the fine, and I figured they don't just let you get away with that. It was nice to have it confirmed by a complete stranger, though. And while this sounds like a pretty big deal (and it probably is), I'm choosing to believe that something that will end up costing me less than $200 to fix is not going to haunt me for the rest of my life. (It won't get me disbarred, anyway.)

And then, later this afternoon, after making seventeen different phone calls to various Kansas government agencies to find out (a) how much I had to pay and (b) where I had to pay it and (c) how to get proof I had paid it so I could get insurance again, I go out to feed the meter I had driven around the block three times to find because I didn't want to spend $11 to park in the lot across the street when I could park at a meter for $1.50 every two hours, or a total of $6. Only when I get out there to deposit the last two hours' worth of quarters, I discover that you're not allowed to park at that particular meter between the hours of 4:00 and 6:30, or you will get a ticket for... and I am not kidding you... $100. One hundred dollars. So I had to move my car into the parking lot anyway, although it was late enough for them to only charge me $5.

So, let's recap: Today, I spent $109.50 to go to work, and tomorrow, I will be driving around in an uninsured, unregistered vehicle while carrying a suspended driver's license.

And I just told the world about it.

How smart am I looking to you now?


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